Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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