I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
