no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize