I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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