sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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