I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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