We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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