if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
