how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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