This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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