So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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