If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
honey bunches of taint.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
