Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
