I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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