I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
