Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize