So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
