tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
