Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
