I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
