Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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