I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
