As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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