Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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