What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Randomize
