i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
