What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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