I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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