Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
we're making bets on your personal life
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
