Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
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