do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
