You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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