guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
