Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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