Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
