I want you more than these girls want KFC
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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