I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
