I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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