ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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