Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
either way he was missing a nipple.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
What drink are we having for lunch?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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