Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Randomize