I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
