Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Ladies don't puke and tell
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
