Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
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it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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