I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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