I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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