Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
