Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
