dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
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