Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
